I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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