when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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