Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
