Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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