I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
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No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
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i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
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