He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
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