the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
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