With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME