Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
