Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
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