It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize
