we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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