Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
