she was so not down for the gang bang
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
