afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
The power of my boobs compel you
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
