I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
