This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize