I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
