Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Randomize
