why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
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