Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
