Ambien. No doubt about it.
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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