i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
