Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
