He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize