so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
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dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
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