is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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