Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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