I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize