i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Omg I joined a choir last night...
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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