he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
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