I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
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