her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
