I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
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