If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
