Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I could fuck to npr.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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