She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
