i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
