Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
She needs sedatives and a leash
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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