You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
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It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
COCAINE IS GR8
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
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