Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize