I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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