his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Holy sore nipples Batman
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
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