do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I deserve to be covered in dicks
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Drunk is not a location!
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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