What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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