He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
