somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
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