I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
