why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Randomize
