Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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