I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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